Blizzard Issues Cease and Desist for Breathing in World of Warcraft Private Servers

In a shocking move, Blizzard has sent out cease and desist letters to players on World of Warcraft private servers for the crime of simply breathing while playing the game.

Players on private servers were left scratching their heads as they received legal notices from Blizzard’s lawyers demanding they stop breathing while logged into the game. According to the cease and desist letters, breathing constitutes a violation of Blizzard’s intellectual property rights and must cease immediately.

One player, who wished to remain anonymous, stated, ‘I couldn’t believe it when I got the letter. I didn’t realize breathing was against the rules. I guess I’ll have to hold my breath while raiding now.’

Blizzard’s legal team defended their actions, stating that they must protect their intellectual property at all costs, even if it means policing basic bodily functions of players on private servers. They warned that failure to comply with the cease and desist orders would result in further legal action.

In response to the backlash from the community, Blizzard issued a statement saying, ‘We understand that this may seem extreme, but we have a duty to protect our IP. Breathing while playing on private servers is a clear violation of our rights, and we must take action to preserve the integrity of the game.’

As players on private servers grapple with this new restriction, many are left wondering what will be next on Blizzard’s legal chopping block. Will blinking be the next forbidden activity while playing World of Warcraft? Only time will tell.

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