Dwarven Miners Launch Class Action Over Unpaid Overtime

IRONFORGE – In what legal experts are already calling the “deepest lawsuit in Azerothian history,” hundreds of disgruntled dwarven miners filed a class-action suit Monday against the Ironforge Mining Consortium, citing decades of unpaid overtime, backbreaking shifts, and the suspicious disappearance of “time-and-a-half” ale rations.

“Fer too long we’ve been shafted!” declared lead plaintiff Bork Ironsnout, his beard still dusted with arcane soot. “We work eighteen hours a day, seven days a week, and the only ‘bonus’ we see is a fresh pickaxe and the promise we’ll live long enough to see daylight.”

The suit alleges that management routinely demands “heroic effort” during overtime, especially during expansion launches and pre-patch ore shortages. “Every time a new continent’s discovered, suddenly there’s a ‘mandatory expedition.’ Nobody gets paid, and don’t even mention hazard pay for Old God slime exposure,” said union rep Grilda Stoneboot, who claims to have lost three cousins to a ‘routine dig’ that ended in an unscheduled encounter with Ragnaros.

‘No Such Thing as Overtime,’ Claims Management

Ironforge Mining Consortium CEO Borin Steelforge pushed back on the allegations. “Our dwarves are paid in the priceless satisfaction of a job well done—and exposure to rare minerals. Plus, every miner gets a commemorative mug after 25 years of loyal service,” he said, holding up a chipped tankard with “#1 Tunnel Rat” hastily scrawled in rune chalk.

Steelforge insists “overtime” is a foreign concept imported by gnomish agitators. “In Ironforge, we work until the job’s done, or until the brew runs out. Usually it’s the brew.”

Shadowy Goblin Lawyers Involved

Legal observers were shocked when the miners’ legal team unveiled their new counsel: the notorious goblin law firm, Dewey, Cheatem & How. “We’re in this strictly for the principle—and the 75% contingency fee,” said lead attorney Grizzik the Green. “We’re prepared to dig through centuries of payroll ledgers, or at least until we find something we can sell to the highest bidder.”

Demands: Gold, Ale, and the Right to Actually See the Sun

The class action’s demands include:

• Retroactive gold for all overtime since the Second War
• A daily ale stipend
• Mandatory sunlight breaks (at least 15 minutes per decade)
• An end to ‘Bring Your Own Pickaxe’ policies

Should the suit succeed, labor historians warn it could set a dangerous precedent, with rumors already circulating of Night Elf Wisps and Orcish Peons eyeing similar litigation.

At press time, Ironforge management was seen hastily boarding up the Deeprun Tram and posting “Now Hiring: Interns” flyers throughout Stormwind.